Steve Pavlina: Overcoming Trust Issues
Matt Forney: How To Get Groupies By Blogging
Last Longer In Bed Techniques: Sexy Sex Positions You Should Try- Part 3
Swords Out, Go And Kill Shit This Week.
Steve Pavlina: Overcoming Trust Issues
Matt Forney: How To Get Groupies By Blogging
Last Longer In Bed Techniques: Sexy Sex Positions You Should Try- Part 3
Swords Out, Go And Kill Shit This Week.
Want to know how it feels to quit porn completely? Well this post is for you. This is a longer post than usual but well worth the read, here;s the TL;DR version if you cannot:
On Oct 1 2013 I quit completely on a whim. Things were getting out of hand and I had to make a change. Around the same time I started EaL I also started a Tumblr that focused on tasteful erotic art, which soon spun out of control. What started as tasteful art degenerated into straight up porn, I started receiving unsolicited nudes from women, offers to cyber, and offers to meet up in person. A 19 year old tight bodied Brazilian woman sent a video of herself getting off to what I had posted. Likewise two 22 year olds sent a vid of them fingering each other to my inbox. Not going to lie, I got hooked.
On 10/1/13 I stopped checking, but never deleted it. I still get updates on new followers and reposts every now and then, but ego stopped me from deleting (who doesn’t love unsolicited nudes / msgs from attractive women?) So it’s been a little over 2 months now and I can say I beat the urges and such. Here’s what I’ve learned. Of course every brain is different and you’re experience will vary. *P= porn, M= masturbation, O=orgasm, hence PMO masturbate to orgasm using porn*. –The first few weeks are absolute shit. I was completely miserable for the first 2-3 weeks. Luckily I read several articles on the always excellent Your Brain On Porn forums. Before you make the decision you have to read up and learn what to expect. The dopamine plug of infinite internet porn is pulled and your brain is pissed. Some guys get physically ill and face something akin to withdrawal symptoms from opiods ( I got the flu last year when I first tried this). The only solution is to eat right, work out, and stay busy. Take supplements to balance out chemical deficiencies in your brain and forge onward.
–Edging, erotic literature/ art, porn, fantasies… I abstained from M completely for the first month. While I have never had a problem with erectile dysfunction, early ejaculation, or anything like that it still takes time for your brain to re-wire itself. Don’t read erotic literature, watch porn, edge, and sometimes you shouldn’t even fantasize. For those of you who don’t know what edging is, it’s keeping yourself at a state of peak arousal with out orgasm / sex and does considerable damage to your prostate. This is sheer willpower, mind over matter stuff. Some guys M, some guys have sex, some abstain during the reboot. It’s your call depending on where you see yourself. I had sex during the process and I like to believe it helped speed up the process.
–Porn blockers and accountability If you really can’t will yourself to stop watching there are resources for you. First off clear your internet history so every time you type in the letter p pornhub doesn’t pop up. While I haven’t used porn blockers, they came highly recommended from the forums. Some of them offer the added option to automatically send an email to someone of your choice if you visit one of the sites on your blacklist. For more accountability use the YBOP forums. There are answers to EVERY concern and question. Men of all ages from 12 – 80 share their experience there and it has helped me substantially. Trust me, when you’re sex drive flatlines and you feel like a eunuch for a week or you relapse it’s important to have that support structure there.
–Relapsing is common, don’t beat yourself up or quit. This generation has practically been raised on porn since they grew up with high speed internet. Some have been watching porn since they were 12 or younger and this forms a major habit, coupled with the fact that GUYS IN THEIR TEENS NOW SUFFER FROM PORN INDUCED ED, this was more than enough reason to stop. Obviously the sooner you pull the plug the better, but there are guys quitting after 20 years and the neural pathways are strongly engrained, enabling a relapse. When this happens DO NOT QUIT THE REBOOT AND DO NOT BINGE. Many have fallen to the death spiral of a relapse whether it pertains to behavioral addictions or drug abuse. I know a few guys who relapsed and then rationalized away hours long porn binges. Guess what, you feel like shit for the next few days because you caved. I don’t reset my counter (partly because after day 30 I stopped counting days and count months now) because I know I’ve worked hard and one slip won’t send me into a spiral. I just now suffered a minor relapse and that’s what made me write this.
–Don’t expect regular people to understand. Not one of my close friends can comprehend the thought of decreasing porn use. I didn’t think it would be so controversial when I brought it up but most guys have never even thought of stopping. Now I just keep it close to my chest.
–Benefits Finally the meat of the issue.
I’m going to start looking at these before I hit the bars from now on.
For your reading pleasure: Why Men Should Sexually Discriminate
Victor Pride: How I Make 10k Per Month Online
Sex 3.0: Imagine If Marriage Didn’t Exist
Journey Of Superman: How To Start A Business With No Money
T Nation: CrossFit: The Good, The Bad, The Ugly
Wall Street Playboys: Cliff Notes For Evaluating A City
Badass Of The Week: Andrei Sakharov
Chaos & Pain: In Death Ground Fight- Part 2
Danger And Play: Find Your Canary In A Coal Mine
This is going to be a weekly post, from now on. Anything I find to help men better themselves will be included, finance, science, self-development, etc… Had about 10 more to post but WP ate the draft. If you see anything worth posting or have a comment drop it in the comment section.
Go out and kill shit this week.
“While the word proactivity is now fairly common in management literature, it is a word you won’t find in most dictionaries. It means more than merely taking initiative. It means that as human beings, we are responsible for our own lives. Our behaviors is a function of our decisions, not our conditions. We can subordinate feelings to values. We have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen.
Look at the word responsibility— “response-abilitiy” —the ability to choose your response. Highly proactive people recognize that responsibility. They do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own conscious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling.
Reactive people are often affected by their physical environment. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn’t, it affects their attitude and their performance. Proactive people can carry their own weather with them. Whether it rains or shines makes no difference to them. They are value driven; and if their value is to produce good quality work, it isn’t a function of whether the weather is conducive to it or not.
Proactive people are still influenced by external stimuli, whether physical, social, of psychological. But their response to the stimuli, conscious or unconscious, is a value-based choice or response.”
The 7 Habits Of Highly Effective People
Redpiller1985 posted an interesting article yesterday over on RoK that shined a light into the dark recesses of the “omega” (I hesitate to use the familiar alpha / beta / sigma dichotomy) male yesterday which caught my attention. I felt that in order to understand my comment some context must be provided lest I be labeled intolerant or worse.
Here is my comment:
First off fuck these losers, they provide NOTHING of value to society and receive all the benefits (welfare, safety, food, etc…) They are not “harmless” as some have suggested, and deserve all of societies scorn and derision for being the leeches they are. Can you imagine the audacity of these losers to publicly vent their hatred for the regular people who provide everything for them? Besides the obvious they also harm society in another more subtle way.
I weep for the plight of the parents. From the first time a man holds his infant son he imagines the great things he can accomplish as he grows. Playing sports, gaining an education, forming a semblance of personality and the great things adult life brings. He hopes this child will provide value to society and maybe become a pillar to his community, helping those in need by assuming the role of a leader both in community and his own family. Truly the future of the child is boundless and uninhibited.
Years later the father watches his son fail miserably socially and professionally in his teenage years. It is a phase, soon to pass he silently hopes. Yet the years pass and while men are forged through these trials and tribulations, his son retreats from them. The son grows physically weak and adopts the mindset of an abject failure unusual for is age. He blames his shortcomings on “personality disorders, childhood traumas, depression, anhedonia, ugliness, social retardation or low ability” (lol). Cynicism and a nihilistic outlook replace the once bright eyes and the father wonders if he himself is to blame. The pathetic incel is disgusted with the world and us “normalscum”, but it does not match the disgust his father holds for him. How does the father face his friends and family knowing his son, his own flesh and blood, is cloistered in his room proudly extolling the virtues(?) of social awkwardness, virginity, and overall faggotry? The pathetic incel neither knows nor cares, he selfishly jerks off to hentai and leeches off welfare, never growing out of the teenage angst phase.
Fuck these losers, fuck them all.
DISCLAIMER: IF YOU DO HAVE A VERIFIABLE MEDICAL ISSUE THEN GET TREATMENT AND THEN READ THIS. FOR THE REST OF YOU SELF-DIAGNOSED WEB MD PROS;
My comment yesterday may sound harsh, I admit it was but as this is a self-development site I disdain men who give up and settle so overtly for peanuts, blame the world, claim victim status, etc… At the same time I can speak on this authoritatively because I have waded through the same cesspool of self-doubt, insecurity, and problems these men have and I made it through. If I didn’t this site wouldn’t exist and I would have never found the sphere. You know what I do when I’m not satisfied with my life? I change shit. It’s that simple, it’s my life, I call the shots. I stopped smoking weed completely 11 months ago, I lift heavy in the gym religiously 3-4 days a week, and I’m a few days away from 2 months without any porn whatsoever. I work 12 hrs and go stick my dick into my town’s nightlife solo dolo year round. I didn’t make these changes all together and yes I did struggle with all of them. You take pieces out and put new pieces in until you find what works for you, that’s the only advice you need. Are people surprised when I tell them I do not watch porn or smoke weed and plan to hit the scene alone, yes, but then again most people are unhappy with their life. If someone isn’t where you want to be then don’t listen to their advice, the same way you wouldn’t take investment advice from a homeless prostitute (crack is always in demand and maintains a steady market value though…)
My words were pointed but in real life I would be the first to befriend them and help on the path to discovery. Sometimes people need to have the knife twisted into their cerebellum though. They have enough of a pity party circle jerk on their forum with the asinine rules of don’t bring up sexual relations, don’t talk about anything unrelated to being a incel hermit, and my personal favorite rule don’t create an echo chamber, apparently the hypocrisy is lost on them. I still stand by words from a place of experience, fuck you and you’re problems, the world doesn’t give two shits about you and you must forge your character through the shitstorm like the rest of us. Don’t blame the rest of society for you’re shortcomings.
Coincidentally on the same day, Science Daily posted this article titled “Repeatedly Exposing Yourself to a Negative Event May Prevent It from Affecting You”. (Well fancy that, who woulda thunk it.) After you read that browse through Emerson’s Self-Reliance and take a shot of Robert Green’s and 50 Cent’s The 50th Law.
Setting realistic goals is a valuable but difficult task for any ambitious soul. Ambition and motivation will mess with you and say you can be flying down I95 in that $4 million Veneno in two years time while you struggle to jump-start you’re 97 Mercury Tracer. Stories of the overnight millionaire and kids who hit it big in their 20’s are exceedingly rare despite the MSM’s insistence that it happens all the time.
People have a vision of “the life” in their mind’s. You know what it generally looks like, a fast car, attractive spouse, spacious house with every amenity, interesting friends, large bankroll, etc… What they don’t realize is that those things are loosely connected at best and don’t come in a nice neat little package. In a nutshell; you can have the money to buy a Ferrari but no have idea how to control 700 hp to the rear wheels. As they say the skills don’t come with the money. You could have the bankroll but the personality of a drunk sloth, guess what you have no friends or significant other. Or you have charisma in spades but no liquid capital, the examples go on forever. Forget that bullshit mindset “money buys happiness” and start setting specific goals in each area of you’re life. If you start from the bottom there is no place for pride in this process.
You want to attract supermodels into your life but can’t approach women alone/sober/at all. Maybe you’ve never been in a relationship or maybe you do well with average looking women. Take positive steps, small at first to work your way up. Start a relationship with an avg chick or one who is below the threshold. Learn the ins and outs of the female mind (through experience not blogs) and build up from there. Trade up when you feel comfortable or start a soft harem. Everyone has different sticking points and it’s impossible to cover them all in a paragraph, most likely you know what you need to do, just do it already.
Pro-tip: Game + Access= Win. If you don’t travel in the same circles as her, you’re gonna be gaming your hand at the end of the night.
Minimum wage slave with big dreams. Focus on doubling your income in the next 2-3 yrs. The lower you start the easier this is i.e… you make $7 an hr currently and a quick craigslist search finds numerous jobs paying at least $14. It gets harder when you bank $500,000 already but not impossible, it just takes a sharper mind and a little ingenuity.
Keep the grand vision in the back of your mind and set small manageable goals daily/weekly/monthly/yearly. This is a marathon not a sprint.
You’re family has disowned you. Friends have abandoned you. Teammates have forsaken you. The seemingly never ending death spiral has finally ended at rock bottom. Alcohol and narcotics ease the pain for a short while. Self-harm makes you feel something again, even if that something is pain, and for that brief fleeting moment everything is right with the world. We know you’re pain, you are not alone. Whether it be a soul shearing divorce at the hands of you’re ex-wife, and you’re ensuing introduction to the demonic secret family courts. Or a false rape charge by a drunken slore. Maybe it’s a sexual harassment HR scandal or one of the other myriad minefields men face in the corporate battlefield day to day.
Regardless of you’re situation you can turn it around, and we will help you brother. As bad as you’re situation may seem, you are not the first to navigate through it. Both Jordan and Afor have survived toxic marriages, continuing to rebuild their lives while sharing their experiences with us. GBFM lays the blueprint for living a life of integrity and honor in an age of widespread deceit and decay through the great books. Victor Pride not only motivates but actually shows you how to build location independent passive income streams so you can reclaim you’re freedom. The list goes on, but I dare you to visit those sites and still feel despondent.
This site extols the virtues of those mentioned. As I’ve previously stated, everything I do and everything I write is meant to help you navigate this life. True there may be some filler, but never any lies. I own my mistakes, as painful and embarrassing as they may be More real-life experience posts are planned for the near future. Sky-diving, ocean kayaking, hiking the highest mountains in the Northeast U.S., how to navigate Vegas, realistic experiences with drugs and other vices, successful public speaking and much more. This life is not easy, but there is help from you’re brothers.
Choice Quote: “The hierarchy of your values dictates your financial destiny”.
Choice Quote: “We are living through the humanization of business”.
Fitness and Health
Choice Quote: “It’s like a drug guys, Success is as addicting a drug as any chemical drug. It’s a high, it’s your endorphins released, naturally. You don’t need to shoot up for it, you don’t need to snort it, you just gotta sweat for it”.
Watch the rest of the Quotivation series.
“I need to get stronger”.
“No, I can do more”.
No quotes, just the baddest man on the planet dismantling every obstacle in his way.
Bloodied, muddied, gasping for air, yet a smile permeates the layers of grime caked to our faces. The same as last year, I ran the (2013) Tri-State Spartan Sprint again this June and had even more fun this time around.
My compatriot from the Warrior Dash, Mt Marcy, and Mt Washington climbs (those articles coming soon) joined me for the race and volunteer shift that preceded. Volunteering for an 8 hour shift waives the admission fee (about $100 depending on when you register), while registering for a 12 hour nets you free admission plus $50. We chose the 8 hr shift, which can be fun in itself. Man the obstacles, work the water stations, register participants at the front desk, nothing too outlandish. You get a free lunch which isn’t too bad either.
Anyway, race time approaches and you line up in the pen waiting for the gun to go off. Smoke grenades and motivational speeches gently assault your senses as everyone prepares for the ensuing chaos. Choose your starting position in the pen wisely, if you’re a confident sprinter start front and center so you don’t trip on those slower. Likewise if you prefer a more leisurely trot start farther back in the pack and stay out of my way (kidding, not really). Steel yourself, once the gun sounds you get to revel in the majesty of running up a ski mountain rippled with jagged rocks.
The toughest obstacle is the terrain itself. Tuxedo Ridge where the race was held is a ski mountain in the winter, so you can imagine the hill climbs to be brutal. They sap your strength quickly and most end up walking them to conserve energy. The obstacles range from laughably easy (knee high walls) to moderately frustrating (spear toss / rope climb / horizontal climbing wall) to “why did I sign up for this” levels (12 ft wall / barb wire crawl) for most people. Personally the only one I really badly botched was the spear toss. The obstacles most couldn’t complete were the one opportunity and done one’s such as the monkey bars, horizontal climbing wall, rope climb, and
fucking spear toss, etc…For each obstacle failed you have to do 30 soul shredding burpees before you progress. The other obstacles like the sandbag carry, tire pull, 4 ft, 8 ft, and 12 ft vertical walls are literally in your way and you have to complete them to continue. Help from your fellow racers is abundant and readily apparent at the vertical walls and cargo net climb where you can get a boost if you need it. With that said it is immensely satisfying to make the 12 ft wall your proverbial bitch by climbing it with nothing but a running start and some willpower.
While the Sprint is the easiest Spartan race at only 4 miles it is not without some danger of injury. Cuts and bruises abound, some broke fingers, twisted ankles, dislocated joints and such. It’s a mud run after all and you have to carefully watch each step. We escaped again with only minor cuts (mostly from the rocks we dragged ourselves over for the barb wire crawl).
The race, environment, and people are all ridiculously fun and enjoyable. The groups of attractive fit women aplenty, getting dirty, getting wild and looking for excitement for a weekend will keep you occupied.Starting a conversation couldn’t be easier since they’re costumed as the Justice League or Doctor Seuss characters. Really it’s open season if you run tight game. We’re big on the idea that you need to surround yourself with people that you want to be with instead of sitting behind a keyboard claiming “there’s no good women/men left”. These races bring out all of the people we love, outgoing, fit, and open to new experiences, if this describes you you’ll fit right in. If you like bookish quiet women go to a library, if you want club rats hit the Jersey Shore, just please stop complaining. The teams are hilarious and this race, while a step up from the Warrior Dash is still easy enough to finish without dedicated training. Contestants from the television show The Biggest Loser ran the course and I think it was an episode if that means anything for you. If you’re looking for a bigger challenge join us in September when we aim for the coveted Trifecta medal with the 8 mile Spartan Super and then 16 mile Spartan Beast in Vermont. See you at the finish line Spartans.
“I feel like her hip bones are too big”
“Pimple problems, you’ll have to fix that.”
“She’s nothing special, but maybe something will come up.”
“She looks like she’s 25 already, it could be a problem.”
Some things said about young women like these…
in the movie Girl Model. Far from the internet nerd rage sperglings suffering from pointy elbows syndrome, these comments come from a vetted model scout looking at highly attractive women in their prime. If you have any inkling of red pill in you, there’s a good laugh to be had watching the head model scout critique these women. This movie is only 77 minutes long but provides numerous takeaways for men looking to develop discriminating tastes and bed beautiful (lingerie model quality) women. I’ll highlight a few for us here.
In the first five minutes we watch the model scout spout those gems to arguably some of the most attractive women in Eastern Europe. The Japanese market they hope to model in prizes slim, petite figures, beautiful smooth faces, and above all youth. Some of those auditioning are as young as 13 (they must pretend they are at least 15) while the upper limits are about 23, coincidentally the same age range men worldwide attribute with beauty (cue misguided feminist rage). The scout has game in spades and it shows. The pimple comment was directed to a girl who would be a hard 8 here in the U.S. and I could only imagine the quality of ass this guy must pull. The trope “act as if” is always good to live by, and you should act as if you were this model scout. But this is his job you might say, true but how many men can deliver that line with a cocky yet dismissive tone, not many I bet. Most manginas would rush to her aid, plaster and chisel in hand to build her a pedestal to raise her to the heavens. This scene alone, only 5 minutes in is worth the watch.
Secondly, it shows how impoverished these girls really are. Nadya, the film’s protagonist lives in a small ramshackle cabin with her family in Russia. Besides school she picks cabbages and talks with her grandmother for fun. No cellphones, one computer, and a whole lot of cabbages. Quite different from the wimminz of America twerking away their education. To be short, they live average lives like the rest of the population. There is no fundamental difference between them and anyone else. Instead they have to rely on being feminine, sexy, and attractive, to land a good husband who won’t beat them in a vodka induced alcoholic rage. 99% of these girls did not make the cut and returned to their village empty handed and will probably farm cabbages for the rest of their lives. Their natural beauty is for naught.
Third, the modeling / fashion industry is more cut-throat than I thought. One of the girls gained 2 cm on her waist size and was sent home ($2,000 in debt to the agency). That is some hardcore quality control. Think about that the next time some pug faced fattie tells you she’s a model.
Fourth, models are crazy just like every other chick you will meet. Ashley, a 32 yr old former model turned model scout (when the wall approached) keeps these toy babies in her house in lieu of other family or pets. She talks to them, caresses them, and otherwise treats them like real children. Listening to her rationalize her
age-related removal decision to walk away from modeling is humorous in itself. She also secretly photographs the models beneath the table while she interviews them and stores the pics in a shoebox. Now if that was a man that would be all sort of criminal charges, but she freely admits it and even shows them. She then shows us pictures of the hairy ulcer removed from her gut. Bitches be crazy.
In closing, watch this movie. Currently streaming on Netflix it is well worth it. The first five minutes alone will change your perception of feminine beauty, helping you become a better critic and raising your standards.. The dolled up humanoid troll known as Nicki Minaj will hold no sway over you. The exceedingly average Selena Gomez and her ilk cannot hold a candle to even the least attractive EE chicks in this film. You must become nonreactive to beauty, this film is a crash course. Enjoy your new eyes.
Related Light Reading For Your Enjoyment
Women Are Average, You Are The Prize: The Female Beta
Nothing Can Stop You: Know That You Are Invincible