For many Americans it is a morning staple to sit down with a cup of coffee and read the morning paper.
As the first source of information a man can obtain before he sets off to start his day, it’s important that this information should brighten his day and put him in a positive mindset to face the many travails ahead of him. If not that, then at least spark some creative thoughts in his head, but not so anymore.
Now when men arise they are greeted with this…
Yes, the first image men awaken to is the story of a mother beating her four year old toddler to death. This is the mindset of savagery and barbarism the (((media))) wants to instill into us men. The mindset that senseless violence will meet you around every corner, strangers will attack you, a general pervasive sense of societal malaise.
This is not so, and will never be. You can today choose to build your relationships with friends and neighbors that share a like minded attitude and values. You can raise proud children that know right from wrong and are not afraid to voice their opinions, and you can vote in local elections to influence your communities fate. Although we will never give up hope, there are some like the owner of the Daily News who wish to fear monger us into submission. I wonder what that parasite who seeks to divide us along racial and economic lines looks like…
And here’s our culprit (((Mortimer Zuckerman))) pictured on the right. Every damn time.
This article only deals with non criminal actions within small social group settings such as family, co-workers, friends, and school since this is where the majority of men spend their time. Some of these reputations get flipped on their head when you’re famous (or infamous), but that is not within the scope of this article.
1)A known liar– You’re lying out of insecurity and trying to impress someone or you honestly believe your own bullshit and think they’re stupid enough to believe it too. Which ever it is, cut that shit out.
Best case: White lies, chronic exaggerator.
Worst case: Sociopathic levels of lying. Bold faced attention seeking lies. Saying you’ll do something and never following through.
2) A gossip– Just remember, it always gets back to them, and the eventual ass kicking will get back to you.
Best case: Harmless infrequent jokes about public information.
Worst case: Betrayal of another persons trusted secrets. Chronic shit talking.
3) A complainer- Life is difficult, no one cares for you’re complaints. Choose an action and follow through. If there is a legitimate concern by all means address it, if not, stay quiet.
Best case: A funny joke about a shared group complaint.
Worst case: Chronic frivolous complaints.
The overarching value that runs through most of these is trust. That is what keeps small groups humming along and once you betray that the group is splintered and easily destroyed. If you carry one of these sordid reputations there are only two ways to rehabilitate it. The first is to simply move on to another group, but they too will see through the facade eventually. The second is intensive character building and relationship repair. Expect months if not years of constantly working to fix the damage you incurred, but in the end you all become stronger for it.
The world is still full of opportunity, hope, and success. Do not listen to the fervent, rabid rantings of those who urge you to “sit poolside and watch it all burn”. Apathy is the enemy and every new day that passes brings further advancements in medicine, technology, architecture, and culture. However if you listen to the naysayers in the media and some prominent bloggers in this corner of the Internet you would think western culture is breathing its last tepid breath. Staples of their arguments consist of rising divorce rates, twerking, ISIS, popular music, etc… yet I refuse to believe we reside in a cultural dark age. There is and always will be good, well meaning people providing quality art that inspires the masses. Here are some of those people and their work.
Talented singer coming out of Cleveland, Ohio. Has created quite a stir in the electronica world with her amazing voice and collaborations with producer Galamatias.
Another sultry singer, this one coming out of Sydney, Australia. I find it difficult to classify her fantastic music into one genre so I’ll let you decide.
The greatest producer you’ve probably never heard of. At only 24 years old, Jaar has taken the music world by storm since 2011 and has released a slew of hits that have tossed up the electronica world. Together with his interdisciplinary production house Other People, Jaar’s stock continues to rise worldwide.
My all-time favorite producer continues to amaze music lovers worldwide by dropping fire on a consistent basis. Six days ago on 10/20/14 he released the title track Flashlight off his album of the same name and it properly hyped us for another solid masterpiece set to drop 12/1/14.
30 minutes before a presentation / interview / date and you don’t feel that familiar burning vigor stirring in your belly. Too little time for a quick gym pump or a Les Brown video, what can a man do in this short time? Besides positive affirmations, these are the quick videos that work for me, and I hope work for you too.
Fedor, the greatest MMA fighter to ever live, and my personal favorite. Watching this nondescript Russian pulverize everyone, regardless of size and strength into submission always gets me amped up. The perfect person to start this list, here are his opening words.
“Before the fight, I try to concentrate on my inner self, think about something I like. Whatever I do, I just try to think about good things, and that helps me. Everytime I win, all of these things, and all of these events, I was getting ready for them.”
Your in full go mode now champ. Remember “no pain, no pain, no pain”.
Finish strong by turning War up, closing your eyes, and visualizing success in the immediate endeavor ahead of you.
If you have a favorite routine to pump you up in 30 min or less, let us all know how you go about it in the comments below. Good luck and God bless.
Welcome back friends for another EaL book review. This time we will be discussing Knut Hamsun’s epic Growth Of The Soil. Written in 1917 this book won the author the 1920 Nobel Prize in literature by relating the fictional tale of hard working settlers in the Norwegian Highlands.
The tale begins with Isak’s humble entry into a wooded valley by the river and his ensuing efforts to settle the area. From there it effortlessly flows through the years to his burgeoning family and community as the wilds become more populated with both man and beast working together to build a life. With great depth and description Hamsun weaves masculine virtues such as honor, respect, patience, and humility into the novel by way of the main characters. Isak himself is the picture of hard work and dedication. Always thinking of the needs of his family, providing for them with only the sweat of his brow and ingenuity. No shortcuts, lofty ideals, or get rich quick schemes here, only conviction to the task at hand whether it be raising a barn or a child. Stolid throughout but in good humour, our protagonist does not utter a word of fatigue or complaint to anyone, a valuable lesson for men everywhere.
Besides these points, this novel has done what many have failed to do of late, and that is put a smile on face. When you read it you will know what I’m talking about. If you’re looking for a novel about family, community, virtue, and a man raising himself from his bootstraps then Growth Of The Soil is for you my friend. 5/5 this is a page turner you will finish quickly and enjoy.
*Rest easy, this post contains no pictures of feminists.
Every four years some of the most dedicated and physically fit human beings alive get together to have wild orgies and sometimes compete against each other for national glory. If you look at these games as a microcosm of humanity we can glean valuable information from them. In particular what characteristics we look for in short term sexual partners. Most of the female Olympians I see in competition fit a standard (excellent) bill. Long hair, radiant smiles, and of course top shelf ability. No matter what country they hail from or what sport they compete in, they all attempt to cultivate a traditional feminine appearance.
But if you think about it, these are the same women who should have every excuse to slack on the additional beauty tips. Of course their bodies are in excellent shape due to the rigorous training, but makeup, hair, nail polish, take precious time when your sore from training for 8 – 10 hours a day. This stands in stark contrast to ugly feminists everywhere who claim they are too “busy” to pretty themselves or cultivate a pleasant personality. These Olympians train daily for years to be the best in the world while Lindy West trains to see how many doughnuts she can fit in her mouth at once.
These Olympians serve as an inspiration to all women, you can be the best in the world and still look good. But hey I’m sure Sandra Fluke had a harder day lobbying on Capitol Hill.
“If I could only live to see it, to be there with you. What I wouldn’t give for twenty more years!“
The old man provides valuable insight into delayed gratification and effective planning. It made me think of where I would be in 20 years, and if I would I even be alive, much less successful in the goals I’ve set. If I don’t have a plan I know I won’t be.
I don’t know a lot of men with a long term plan. Sure the cops and teachers want to make it through their 20 years and retire, but that boils down to survival more so than dedicated plan. I think with age the ability to plan long term arises, but by then it’s too late. Most of the mid 20’s men I know barely have a 2 year plan, and what they do have only concerns their career. If you ask them where they will be in 5-10 years, it’s the rare man that can give a definitive answer. Of course circumstances change and unforeseen opportunities arise but even a general sense of direction will help. That’s where the lofty goal comes in. Like a far off lighthouse guiding you through the mist and rough waves of life, the goal acts as a beacon. How you navigate the various obstacles is up to you, but the direction is always clear. An oft used example would be Odysseus and his adventures on the way back to his beloved family. Years and thousands of miles separate the man from his home, but possession of self and mental fortitude forge a rugged attitude, “nothing will stop me from my goal”.
My advice on planning is distilled in a quote spoken by Dwigt D. Eisenhower. “In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.” I know and fully expect for problems to arise. No plan survives first contact and by expecting issues and allotting both time and resources you can effectively overcome them. Think back to when you waited until the last moment to write a paper for school. You find out there’s an extra section to write, the printer doesn’t work, traffic on the road, internet slows to a crawl. You didn’t plan for the problems and paid the price, now extrapolate that for life.
Many men think they have the world of time to accomplish their vision. “Just as soon as I finish school, pay my loans, move, etc…” I’m guilty of it too and I fight everyday to stay on track. You’re mortal, you will die, and you probably won’t see it coming. There isn’t time to reminisce on missed opportunities, neither is there time to drag your feet in fulfilling your goals.
Sit down and write out where you want to be in 5, 10, 15 years. Mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, where you want to live, where you want your family to be (financially, physically, etc…) I don’t know what diverse goals you have set for yourself but charting a road map is the only way to success.
“Relapse is now seen as the rule rather than the exception in addiction recovery. And it is no longer viewed as a catastrophe but as an opportunity for learning more and better strategies for overcoming urges and for identifying the moods and situations that are likely to be difficult. What is inappropriate is black-and-white thinking about success that turns a slip-up into a disaster and sees it as a sure sign of defeat. The fact is that it takes time to change all the mental apparatus that supports any particular habit-the memories, the situations that trigger craving, and more. Addiction changes brains, and it takes time to change brains back.”
*Disclaimer: I’m not a doctor, nor should this advice be substituted for professional medical advice.*
Days Without Incident: 0
Look in the mirror, reset the counter, regret the encounter. Whether your addiction is substance related or behavioral, the chance of a relapse is substantial. As I said before, the opioid system and habit cycle in your body are formidable opponents in the face of change. To change engrained systems such as these will take time and effort. This recent foray into addiction management hasn’t been my first rodeo and I’ve come up with a steps that help straighten my mind out. Some might work for you and some won’t, take them with a grain of salt.
– Deal with the immediate medical issues / emergencies (stomach pumped, etc…)
– You feel like dogshit, mentally and physically, accept that you made a mistake.
– Contact your support structure, ideally people that fully understand addiction and relapse and will not judge you harshly such as Narcotics / Alcoholics Anon, addiction clinics / wards, friends, family, hotlines.
-The shame, addiction, shame spiral is extremely powerful. (You use drugs to ease the pain of shame, then feel more shame after, negative feedback loop.) You must focus on the positive to snap yourself out of it. You have the courage and fortitude to take the first steps toward sobriety and had a small misstep along the path. You have not failed, only faltered momentarily.
– Write down everything that lead up to the relapse. Events, how and what you felt, why you felt that way. Jotting it down will clear up the reasons why and will help you rectify the situation next time.
– Change you state: State dependent memory is real and can sink your boat. Work out and get a sweat going, change your clothes, go for a walk. Learn what moods and situations trigger your addiction cravings and deal with them accordingly. You’re going to have to remove certain people and things from your life, accept that.
-Dr. Gabor Mate’s definition of sobriety: “Sobriety is developing a mind state focused not on staying away from something bad, but on living a life led by positive values and intentions. It means living in the present moment, neither driven by ghosts of the past nor lulled and tormented by fantasies and fears of the future.” Read his book, it changed my life and will probably change yours.
Share your best tips on how to successfully cope with a relapse in the comments. Good luck and God bless.