30 minutes before a presentation / interview / date and you don’t feel that familiar burning vigor stirring in your belly. Too little time for a quick gym pump or a Les Brown video, what can a man do in this short time? Besides positive affirmations, these are the quick videos that work for me, and I hope work for you too.
Fedor, the greatest MMA fighter to ever live, and my personal favorite. Watching this nondescript Russian pulverize everyone, regardless of size and strength into submission always gets me amped up. The perfect person to start this list, here are his opening words.
“Before the fight, I try to concentrate on my inner self, think about something I like. Whatever I do, I just try to think about good things, and that helps me. Everytime I win, all of these things, and all of these events, I was getting ready for them.”
Your in full go mode now champ. Remember “no pain, no pain, no pain”.
Finish strong by turning War up, closing your eyes, and visualizing success in the immediate endeavor ahead of you.
If you have a favorite routine to pump you up in 30 min or less, let us all know how you go about it in the comments below.Good luck and God bless.
Welcome back friends for another EaL book review. This time we will be discussing Knut Hamsun’s epic Growth Of The Soil. Written in 1917 this book won the author the 1920 Nobel Prize in literature by relating the fictional tale of hard working settlers in the Norwegian Highlands.
The tale begins with Isak’s humble entry into a wooded valley by the river and his ensuing efforts to settle the area. From there it effortlessly flows through the years to his burgeoning family and community as the wilds become more populated with both man and beast working together to build a life. With great depth and description Hamsun weaves masculine virtues such as honor, respect, patience, and humility into the novel by way of the main characters. Isak himself is the picture of hard work and dedication. Always thinking of the needs of his family, providing for them with only the sweat of his brow and ingenuity. No shortcuts, lofty ideals, or get rich quick schemes here, only conviction to the task at hand whether it be raising a barn or a child. Stolid throughout but in good humour, our protagonist does not utter a word of fatigue or complaint to anyone, a valuable lesson for men everywhere.
Besides these points, this novel has done what many have failed to do of late, and that is put a smile on face. When you read it you will know what I’m talking about. If you’re looking for a novel about family, community, virtue, and a man raising himself from his bootstraps then Growth Of The Soil is for you my friend. 5/5 this is a page turner you will finish quickly and enjoy.
*Rest easy, this post contains no pictures of feminists.
Every four years some of the most dedicated and physically fit human beings alive get together to have wild orgies and sometimes compete against each other for national glory. If you look at these games as a microcosm of humanity we can glean valuable information from them. In particular what characteristics we look for in short term sexual partners. Most of the female Olympians I see in competition fit a standard (excellent) bill. Long hair, radiant smiles, and of course top shelf ability. No matter what country they hail from or what sport they compete in, they all attempt to cultivate a traditional feminine appearance.
But if you think about it, these are the same women who should have every excuse to slack on the additional beauty tips. Of course their bodies are in excellent shape due to the rigorous training, but makeup, hair, nail polish, take precious time when your sore from training for 8 – 10 hours a day. This stands in stark contrast to ugly feminists everywhere who claim they are too “busy” to pretty themselves or cultivate a pleasant personality. These Olympians train daily for years to be the best in the world while Lindy West trains to see how many doughnuts she can fit in her mouth at once.
These Olympians serve as an inspiration to all women, you can be the best in the world and still look good. But hey I’m sure Sandra Fluke had a harder day lobbying on Capitol Hill.
“If I could only live to see it, to be there with you. What I wouldn’t give for twenty more years!“
The old man provides valuable insight into delayed gratification and effective planning. It made me think of where I would be in 20 years, and if I would I even be alive, much less successful in the goals I’ve set. If I don’t have a plan I know I won’t be.
I don’t know a lot of men with a long term plan. Sure the cops and teachers want to make it through their 20 years and retire, but that boils down to survival more so than dedicated plan. I think with age the ability to plan long term arises, but by then it’s too late. Most of the mid 20′s men I know barely have a 2 year plan, and what they do have only concerns their career. If you ask them where they will be in 5-10 years, it’s the rare man that can give a definitive answer. Of course circumstances change and unforeseen opportunities arise but even a general sense of direction will help. That’s where the lofty goal comes in. Like a far off lighthouse guiding you through the mist and rough waves of life, the goal acts as a beacon. How you navigate the various obstacles is up to you, but the direction is always clear. An oft used example would be Odysseus and his adventures on the way back to his beloved family. Years and thousands of miles separate the man from his home, but possession of self and mental fortitude forge a rugged attitude, “nothing will stop me from my goal”.
My advice on planning is distilled in a quote spoken by Dwigt D. Eisenhower. “In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.” I know and fully expect for problems to arise. No plan survives first contact and by expecting issues and allotting both time and resources you can effectively overcome them. Think back to when you waited until the last moment to write a paper for school. You find out there’s an extra section to write, the printer doesn’t work, traffic on the road, internet slows to a crawl. You didn’t plan for the problems and paid the price, now extrapolate that for life.
Many men think they have the world of time to accomplish their vision. “Just as soon as I finish school, pay my loans, move, etc…” I’m guilty of it too and I fight everyday to stay on track. You’re mortal, you will die, and you probably won’t see it coming. There isn’t time to reminisce on missed opportunities, neither is there time to drag your feet in fulfilling your goals.
Sit down and write out where you want to be in 5, 10, 15 years. Mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, where you want to live, where you want your family to be (financially, physically, etc…) I don’t know what diverse goals you have set for yourself but charting a road map is the only way to success.
“Relapse is now seen as the rule rather than the exception in addiction recovery. And it is no longer viewed as a catastrophe but as an opportunity for learning more and better strategies for overcoming urges and for identifying the moods and situations that are likely to be difficult. What is inappropriate is black-and-white thinking about success that turns a slip-up into a disaster and sees it as a sure sign of defeat. The fact is that it takes time to change all the mental apparatus that supports any particular habit-the memories, the situations that trigger craving, and more. Addiction changes brains, and it takes time to change brains back.”
*Disclaimer: I’m not a doctor, nor should this advice be substituted for professional medical advice.*
Days Without Incident: 0
Look in the mirror, reset the counter, regret the encounter. Whether your addiction is substance related or behavioral, the chance of a relapse is substantial. As I said before, the opioid system and habit cycle in your body are formidable opponents in the face of change. To change engrained systems such as these will take time and effort. This recent foray into addiction management hasn’t been my first rodeo and I’ve come up with a steps that help straighten my mind out. Some might work for you and some won’t, take them with a grain of salt.
- Deal with the immediate medical issues / emergencies (stomach pumped, etc…)
- You feel like dogshit, mentally and physically, accept that you made a mistake.
- Contact your support structure, ideally people that fully understand addiction and relapse and will not judge you harshly such as Narcotics / Alcoholics Anon, addiction clinics / wards, friends, family, hotlines.
-The shame, addiction, shame spiral is extremely powerful. (You use drugs to ease the pain of shame, then feel more shame after, negative feedback loop.) You must focus on the positive to snap yourself out of it. You have the courage and fortitude to take the first steps toward sobriety and had a small misstep along the path. You have not failed, only faltered momentarily.
- Write down everything that lead up to the relapse. Events, how and what you felt, why you felt that way. Jotting it down will clear up the reasons why and will help you rectify the situation next time.
- Change you state: State dependent memory is real and can sink your boat. Work out and get a sweat going, change your clothes, go for a walk. Learn what moods and situations trigger your addiction cravings and deal with them accordingly. You’re going to have to remove certain people and things from your life, accept that.
-Dr. Gabor Mate’s definition of sobriety: “Sobriety is developing a mind state focused not on staying away from something bad, but on living a life led by positive values and intentions. It means living in the present moment, neither driven by ghosts of the past nor lulled and tormented by fantasies and fears of the future.” Read his book, it changed my life and will probably change yours.
Share your best tips on how to successfully cope with a relapse in the comments. Good luck and God bless.
This is going to be a weekly post, from now on. Anything I find to help men better themselves will be included, finance, science, self-development, etc… Had about 10 more to post but WP ate the draft. If you see anything worth posting or have a comment drop it in the comment section.
“While the word proactivity is now fairly common in management literature, it is a word you won’t find in most dictionaries. It means more than merely taking initiative. It means that as human beings, we are responsible for our own lives. Our behaviors is a function of our decisions, not our conditions. We can subordinate feelings to values. We have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen.
Look at the word responsibility— “response-abilitiy” —the ability to choose your response. Highly proactive people recognize that responsibility. They do not blame circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. Their behavior is a product of their own conscious choice, based on values, rather than a product of their conditions, based on feeling.
Reactive people are often affected by their physical environment. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn’t, it affects their attitude and their performance. Proactive people can carry their own weather with them. Whether it rains or shines makes no difference to them. They are value driven; and if their value is to produce good quality work, it isn’t a function of whether the weather is conducive to it or not.
Proactive people are still influenced by external stimuli, whether physical, social, of psychological. But their response to the stimuli, conscious or unconscious, is a value-based choice or response.”